Jamie Mendez
Ms. Cowart
ENGL 1301
September 20, 2015
My Writing Process
There is an abundance of writing styles and processes that writers use to compose an essay. These methods allow the writer to organize, revise, and form their ideas or theories into a well thought-out paper. My writing process, however, can only be described with one word—disheveled.
The word essay causes intense anxiety. The idea of writing a paper causes my fight-or-flight response to kick into overdrive. Procrastination sets in, and suddenly, other things need to be done first before I can even think about an essay: the dishes need to be washed, the laundry is piling up, and I have another assignment in Anatomy and Physiology that is due in only five days! After all the other tasks are in order (or in this case, the due date nears closer), it takes a lot to muster up the courage to sit down and finally wrap my brain around what it is I really need to do—write a paper.
The idea of being judged about my writing is probably where the anxiety comes from. My thoughts, ideas, and emotions are on paper to be broken apart and criticized. I have always looked at writing as a form of intelligence. For instance, an exceptional paper is an indication of an intelligent writer. I have never viewed my own writing as exceptional or witty so it is difficult for me to allow other people to read my work. It is easier to avoid writing altogether.
Environment and writing tools are very important to my writing process. Noise reduction is key. Too much noise (i.e. television, music, conversation, etc.) hinders my ability to concentrate and get my thoughts organized. I am also partial to the classic pen and paper versus the computer or typewriter. Taking the time to physically write a paper is very relaxing.
When it comes to drafts, mine tends to look like an ink pen leaked all over the page. Words are circled that might need to be changed, sentences that are crossed out that do not flow, and arrows that indicate where one sentence needs to come before the preceding one. My writing process does not believe in one draft. It is a process that uses as many drafts needed to finalize the essay. My draft is a jumble of ideas thrown onto a paper and corrected as I work. In high school, I once had to write a paper using a web graph to form the outline. This graph was to be turned in along with the final draft of the paper. When the outline was returned to me, the writing on top of the graph stated, “did not follow what was written”.
Well-organized papers have never been a strong-suit of mine. The concept of how a paper should be compiled is fairly simple. The problem that appears most often is what people call “rabbit trails”. In school, it was unacceptable to veer away from the writing topic that was assigned. There was to be no information added to the paper that did not give weight to the topic. It was almost as if there was only one way of writing a paper and no other theories or ideas could be explored or analyzed. My mind has a tendency to focus on a certain aspect of the subject, go in-depth, and form other ideas, so that when the paper is finished, it could become an entirely separate paper altogether, never really covering the original topic. The gray areas of writing are more enticing to me than black and white.
The final draft will be proof-read countless times until I finally decide to surrender my work; just before the point of insanity is reached. I am my own worst critic. There has been one paper that I have written that truly gave me peace-of-mind. The paper was a mid-semester essay on symbolism in the book, Lord of the Flies. The draft was proof-read by a retired English teacher before the final draft was submitted for grading.
My writing process is disorganized, rushed, and can sometimes get off topic. I am comfortable with my rabbit trails. I am not Ralph Waldo Emerson or Ernest Hemingway, but I am me. Maybe one day the anxiety will not be as harsh and the procrastination will cease, but as of right now, I will choose to embrace it and learn from it.